5 Unique Reasons Why Communication in Marriage is Important
All kinds of relationships thrive on communication. And communication is as essential as love when it comes to marriage, maybe even more.
Having a successful, peaceful, and happy relationship with your spouse is one of the importance of communication in marriage.
No healthy marriage tip is complete without emphasizing the need for partners to be able to share pieces of themselves with each other: the good, the bad, and the ugly. Even the things you think don’t have any significance, like how you got angry at a customer for holding up the line or how you admired a dog walking past the street.
Communication is one of the key factors that makes a successful marriage.
Now, if you are wondering why communication in marriage is such an essential aspect of marital success, then don’t go away.
What is communication?
In the context of marriage, communication is the verbal and non-verbal way of expressing your opinions, feelings, and emotions while also observing and paying attention to your partner’s opinions, feelings, and emotions.
With communication, it is effective only when it goes two ways – talking and listening. Note that these two actions cannot be done simultaneously and therefore involves someone who wants to be heard and someone who wants to listen.
Communication in marriage needs both partners to compromise and give way to the other person.
Why communication in marriage can be hard
There are different reasons why it gets difficult to communicate effectively in marriage. It could be due to past hurt, and you just want to be able to protect your heart. Some people have been so scared that they now use those moments to define their expectations.
Other times, it could be because of a lack of understanding. This shouldn’t be the case because you guys are married, but sadly, we see it happening.
“I’m listening to you, but I can’t just wrap my head around it; I don’t understand why you think, act, or see things that way.”
When this happens often, you get tired of trying to explain your POV, and that’s it.
Lastly, to have effective communication, especially in marriage, you sometimes need to be brutally honest. But people avoid this for many reasons, like the desire to keep their partner from being hurt with their brutal honesty.
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Reasons communication in marriage is important
No matter your ‘valid’ or ‘non-valid’ reasons for you to avoid communication, it doesn’t downplay the importance in any way. There are many reasons why communication in marriage is important.
I had a friend who was madly in love with a girl when we were in college. Just a glance, and you would instantly know that he was done for. So, they started going out. But one day, he confided in me that he wanted to end things, and I was so shocked. When I asked him why he wanted that, he said there was a lack of communication. And that was the moment in my life when I understood how much value communication holds in a relationship.
Here are my top 5 reasons why communication in marriage is important:
1. Develops your relationship
The most effective way to develop any marriage is through communication. Relationship development takes several forms and might require different factors, but communication has a wide-ranging effect on a relationship. It builds trust in your spouse and makes it almost impossible to believe outside reports. When there is effective communication in marriage, it helps you understand your spouse better.
Also, assumptions are thrown out the window, and you will start to feel more connected with your partner.
The more things you talk about, the closer you become until you even start to make excuses for each other.
2. Helps you avoid some arguments
Having constant conflicts in marriage can be exhausting and frustrating. But when you communicate with each other, these conflicts reduce drastically. And you now know why your spouse reacts in a certain way, thereby predicting his reaction to some of your actions.
Communication lets you know the ‘why’ of your partner’s behavior and thus makes their actions more acceptable than they would’ve been without communication.
Many arguments can be avoided when there is an understanding of why the other person reacts in a certain way.
3. Helps you understand yourself
I’ve had situations where I initially thought I had grasped my feelings about certain topics until I engaged in conversations about them. And this is what communication does. Besides strengthening your relationship, it helps you understand how you think and feel about specific issues.
When you understand yourself, you are happier and able to express yourself better. You also know what you want, what you can tolerate, and otherwise.
Imagine a situation where someone is trying to understand you when you don’t even understand yourself! The conversation won’t go well.
4. You get to learn something new
When you constantly communicate with your partner, you learn new things about yourself, your spouse, and even life. Getting to know your spouse’s perspective on things, seeing things from their point of view, and getting a grasp of his knowledge in specific fields of interest can help you become more versatile and mature about how you will approach things in the future.
For example, couples that communicate share things about their work, field, daily encounter with people, and even serious issues regarding certain concepts.
Understanding a perspective that is different from yours (even if you don’t agree with it) will make you wiser and more mature.
5. Happy Marriage and Happy Children
A peaceful marriage with minimal disagreements and complete understanding is bliss. Communication is one of the significant factors determining if a marriage will be successful. When you have a successful marriage and a great relationship with your spouse, it reflects in your children’s upbringing.
Children are keen observers and what they see is what they believe to be the truth. The way your marriage is is how your children will view marriage. When your marriage is peaceful, they’ll desire one just like yours, but when it’s not, they might be scared of the entire concept.
Happy marriages breed happy children.
Bible verses about communication
- James 1:19
“So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath;”
- Ephesians 4:29
“Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.”
- Proverbs 18:2,13
“A fool has no delight in understanding, But in expressing his own heart…. He who answers a matter before he hears it, It is folly and shame to him.”
- Psalms 19:14
“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart Be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer.”
- Proverbs 1:5
“A wise man will hear and increase learning, And a man of understanding will attain wise counsel,”
- Colossians 4:6
“Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one.”
Communication tips for couples
Here are some of the things I’ve learned about communicating with my husband over the years:
- Hit the nail on the head – ALWAYS
- Ask questions when you don’t understand
- Talk about deep things to understand your spouse’s mentality
- Communicate not provoke
- Always listen and try to remember
- Don’t assume
- Be selfless
- Be vulnerable
- Accept your blame
- Express your love even in anger
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash
Let’s Recap
Everyone needs someone to connect with, which is only achievable through communication. In marriage, the need to connect with your spouse is heightened beyond being physical with each other. To understand and be understood becomes even a deeper need.
If your marriage is void of communication, you might want to press pause on other things you’ve been working on and focus on trying to build a good communication routine with your spouse. When you communicate better with your spouse, the truth is, it’s going to reflect in your children’s lives as well.
Do you agree that communication in marriage is important? What ranking would you give communication regarding marriage essentials for any couple? Let me know in the comments below.
You know what? Do a 1-month communication challenge with your husband and tell me the feedback via inquiettrust@gmail.com. I bet you it’s gonna be gooood!
READ ALSO: Easy steps to build and maintain spiritual intimacy in marriage
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